Labor Day ushers in a huge rush of activity into normal American lifestyle.
Children go back to school. New clothes and school supplies get bought. Schedules get made. Books are covered. Calendars are organized. Sports teams, clubs, youth groups get assembled. Open-house dates are booked. Music and dance lessons are scheduled, and future rehearsal and recital dates are entered into the calendar. New deadlines, start dates, and weekly commitments come pouring in, along with a firm resolution to remember to breathe and take time for yourself.
In America, Labor Day marks the end of the unofficially approved respite from constant work and responsibility, and the commencement of another tens months of dutiful, productive activity. Thus, I believe, more decision-making and goal-setting happens at Labor Day than January 1st. In September, everyone cranks up the pace several notches.
In divorce world, this means two things:
- The September court calendar is packed as the divorce judges seek to have all open divorce cases return to court front-and-center to see what can get settled.
- Lots of people finally get around to hiring divorce lawyers to start the divorce process for the divorce decision that they made sometime between June and August.
If you’re in that category, here are a few hints:
- Write down all of your questions.
- Read “Shark Bait: What Every Divorce Rookies Needs to Know” so you’ll know as much as possible going into the process. It’s easy reading & will take less than 1 hour. Using 1 hour of your time wisely now could save you 10 hours of attorney fees later (that’s over $2,500.00 on average!)
- Know that a divorce is usually a 9 months – 24 months process, regardless of whether that fits your time frame; it can be different, but not usually without making other sacrifices that you probably don’t want to make. Adjust your expectations to resolving this by next summer – you’ll end up a lot happier that way.
- Know that your hurt feelings and resentment from the marriage will not be addressed in the divorce process, settlement or trial.
- See a therapist, get connected with your spiritual community, read/listen to a lot of spiritual and self-help books/CDs.
- Rent a good comedy and get the popcorn ready.
